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Diny Davis (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

“Love is like the wind, you can’t see it but you can feel it.” – Nicholas Sparks

Have you ever found yourself at a crossroads in your relationship, where your words just don’t seem to resonate with your partner? If so, it’s possible that the two of you might be speaking entirely different love languages. Understanding and learning these love languages has the power to transform your relationships. In this article, I’ll take you on my personal journey of becoming fluent in love languages and explore the profound impact it had on my relationship.

Discovering My Partner’s Languages

Sharing insights with my partner brought an eye-opening discussion. Through open conversations and mutual explorations, we discovered that acts of service resonated much more with my partner than gifts did. This experience altered how we approached daily interactions and expressions of love.

Bridging the Gap

If there is a lack of expression, then a gap can appear in any relationship. But with adequate actions from both people, this gap can be bridged. And to create a bridge, my partner and I committed to understand each other’s priorities, interests and hobbies.

My Journey to Love Language Fluency

The concept of love languages, introduced by Dr. Gary Chapman, suggests that we all have preferred ways of giving and receiving love. Becoming fluent in all five love languages wasn’t an overnight process for me. It took time, effort and a lot of self-reflection. Here’s how I tackled each language:

Mastering Words of Affirmation

Start appreciating your partner’s efforts and time. Complimenting your partner not only brightens their day, but yours too. It becomes a habit when it is done on a daily basis, a way to start the day on a happy note.

Perfecting Acts of Service

This language came more naturally to me, but I learned to be more intentional about it. I started paying attention to the little things that would make my partner’s life easier. This gave me immense joy, as my partner valued my time and efforts too. Who doesn’t like to receive a validation for one’s efforts?

Refining the Art of Gift-Giving

Try to understand your partner’s likes. They will be amazed to receive a gift from you that was mentioned a long time back. It will be a surprise for them to know that your conversations were given so much importance.

Elevating Quality Time

Spending quality time with your partner is very important. If spending quality time with them on weekdays is not possible, then make sure to at least grab some time in the morning or evening for conversation with your partner. Trust me, it won’t take more than 10 minutes. 

Make sure to plan to go out together on a weekend. It doesn’t need to be a fancy place, it can just be a walk in the park or beach while watching a sunrise or sunset.

Embracing Physical Touch

Simple physical touch like a hug or kiss is as important as a smile in any relationship. Greeting your partner with a hug whenever they leave home or giving one when they return can reinforce the idea that their presence is significant to you.

The Challenges of Multilingual Love

Becoming fluent in all five love languages wasn’t without its challenges. There were times when it felt forced or unnatural. I had to remind myself that, like learning any new language, it needed practice and persistence.

Balancing Act

Another challenge was learning to balance all five languages. It’s easy to fall back on your preferred method, but true fluency means being able to switch between languages as needed.

The Rewards of Love Language Fluency

The effort to become fluent in all five love languages has paid off in ways I never imagined. My relationship has become deeper, more fulfilling and stronger.

Applying Love Languages Beyond Romantic Relationships

One of the most surprising aspects of my journey was realizing that love languages apply to all types of relationships, not just romantic ones: understanding my friends’ love languages has helped me be a better friend. I know which friends appreciate a thoughtful gift and which ones would rather have a long, uninterrupted conversation.

In the same way, applying love languages to family relationships has helped to strengthen my familial bonds as well. 

The Transformative Power of Love Languages

My journey to becoming fluent in all five love languages has been transformative. It’s changed not only how I express love, but also how I value and receive it. I’ve learned that love is not a one-size-fits-all concept, but a rich, varied language with many dialects.

By putting in the effort to learn and speak all five love languages, I’ve enriched my relationships, improved my communication skills and gained a deeper understanding of human connection. It’s a journey I’d recommend to anyone looking to enhance their relationships and emotional intelligence.

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Diny Davis is an aspiring author who is passionate about fitness and a strong believer in the close connection between physical and mental health. She is a journalism, psychology and literature graduate, a loving wife and a caring mother who maintains a balance in her work and personal life while giving emphasis to self-care.