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Lauren Long (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

The musical duo Sugarland was a regular presence in our household while I was growing up. My younger sister religiously played their music, but despite her best attempts to convert me, I never turned into a Sugarland fan. Don’t get me wrong, I like their music, but just as my sister and I have different interests and taste in clothes despite sharing DNA, we have different taste in music, though we do love some of the same artists. 

One of Sugarland’s songs that has always stuck with me is “Already Gone,” and the lines “My mama mapped out the road that she knows/Which hands to shake and which hands you hold.” I believe that people come into our lives for a reason, and that some are meant to stay forever, while others only appear in a few chapters. But what they all have in common is that they are placed in our lives so that we can learn from them and teach them something in return. We can all learn from each other, if we take the time and have the patience to.

I’ve had a lot of people walk into my life and walk out again, but like I said above, some people aren’t meant to stay in our lives. And then there are the people who you connect with right away because your soul recognizes them as the people you’ve been searching for your whole life. For me, those people are the beautiful human beings I’ve met through the pole dance community and my work with the Empowered Pole Dance Project. 

It was destiny that brought them into my life at the right time, and I want to dedicate this piece to them because without them, I wouldn’t be where I am right now. 

The crazy thing is, I haven’t met any of the people who have worked with me on The Empowered Pole Dance Project in person. Our interactions have all been virtual, whether on Instagram or over email. I met the majority of the dancers I’ve interviewed on Instagram, and even though miles, state lines and, in some cases, oceans separate us, I feel a connection with them that I’ve never felt with anyone in my younger years. 

The very first pole dancer I met on Instagram was my friend Irina in Italy. I had ordered a copy of her book Pole Dance Fitness off of Amazon and I tagged her in an Instagram post of the book propped against my pole. She shared it and tagged me in her story, I shared her story to mine, and the rest is history. She came into my life at the right time because the world had shut down due to the pandemic, and we talked everyday over Instagram and later WhatsApp. Our connection saved both of us from the loneliness and depression that was felt by many during the dark year of 2020. 

While our lives became busy once things started opening up again, we still keep in touch and find ways to work around the time difference that comes with being an ocean and then some apart. 

Irina, along with the dancers of the Empowered Pole Dance Project in our Instagram group chat, were all there for me last summer when my family experienced a double tragedy. They showed their love and support during the five days of waiting, offering prayers for my family and I, and continued to do so in the days, weeks and months that came after. 

Through the fog of grief, I felt their love and support. They were lights in the dark guiding me forward and always took a few minutes to reach out and ask if I was okay. It was with their love, patience, prayers and support that I slowly began to return to myself, and I will be forever thankful to them because, at a time when I needed it the most, they gave me love and encouragement, and held space for me to grieve, heal and breathe. 

When I asked these people to be a part of the Empowered Pole Dance Project, I had no way of knowing that they would become some of the most important people in my life and help me get through some of the darkest days of my life. Some people have come into my life by chance, but it is my belief that these beautiful souls came into it by destiny. I think someone or something saw that I needed them and would need them, and if I didn’t believe that there was a greater plan at work before, I do now. 

The people who come into your life and stay for the good and bad times are your true friends, and true friends are angels on Earth. 

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Born and raised in Quesnel, BC, Lauren Long is a strong advocate for mental health and well-being, as well as being a major Swiftie and a role model for positive body image. When she’s not writing, you can find her on the pole, on the training mats or curled up with a good book.