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Cristina Crescenzo (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

When it comes to dealing with pain, I know there is no one right way to go about it, because as brutal as it can be, pain is essential to our lives. It can somehow mould people into whom they were meant to be, or break them down into nothing. I suppose it all depends on how we react to the pressure, like how, back in the day, it was believed coal could be turned into a diamond. I think that’s why it is interesting when most people say you should let go of your pain, since personally I don’t think it’s a question of, “Are you able to let go of your pain to move forward?” But instead, “Are you strong enough to carry your pain with you on your journey?” As I am writing this, it sounds almost ridiculous inside my head, given how I live my life and how many times I have wanted to give up because I feel there is too much pain for me to carry on my own. 

However, I suppose the reason I have been bearing this weight for years with no rest is because a small part of me is still hopeful, in the absence of a promise, that one day when I do get where I am going, I will become a diamond. Yet, as much as I want to keep being reassured with positive platitudes, I know everyone has their own capacity for pain, and so like many things in this world, there are no guarantees and we can crumble. I am not the leading authority on human resilience. Sometimes I even resent it, but what I can say to people who could be reading this right now is that there have been many times I have almost shattered, but somehow I have been able to rally my strength and carry on for one more day. If your next question is why, my answer would be the love that follows pain. 

Love is something that nags pain just as much as it nags us because they are a package deal. That is why, when the pain becomes so excruciating that I feel like I can’t go on, love will be there to help me get back up again. It sounds silly, I know, but as much as the pain in my heart wants to push that feeling away, I know deep down that the love I have for others and that they have for me is the reason I have been able to hack it for this long. If you are someone who is able to pull themselves up from their own bootstraps, I commend you, because that is truly incredible. I am someone that has always needed a little support, and there is nothing wrong with that either. Accepting help in the face of adversity does not make you any less strong, it just makes you a different type of strong, a strength that is also vital to survival.

In conclusion, hold on tight to your pain and I will too, because it can be an asset to us if we let it, and even in the end, if we turn into diamonds that come out a little rough, we are still just as rare and beautiful. 

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My name is Cristina Crescenzo and I love to write. Low Entropy is a great organization that lets me do that with topics I am interested in while I am still trying to figure things out. Above all, I just hope my writing connects with someone and that I continue spreading positivity and awareness of mental health and the disabled community.