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Eri Ikezawa (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

The matter of citizenship to me is personal (and quite possibly unnecessarily complicated). 

The facts, of course, are simple: I am a permanent resident of Canada with citizenship in Japan. 

But the human experience often surpasses and transcends mere reason, facts and logic. And so, even as an adult, I struggle with a little bit of an identity crisis when it comes to citizenship and “political loyalties.” 

As someone who grew up in Canada from a young age, I cannot deny that I hold great pride, joy, and gratitude for having grown up in this beautiful country. This being said, I feel tremendous kinship and delight in my birth country of Japan; my full name is Japanese, my mother is Japanese, I speak Japanese, I grew up eating Japanese food (mind you, I also love Sri Lankan food, have a Sri Lankan name and adore being in Sri Lanka; the only difference is I hold no citizenship there). 

Naturally, the simplest solution would be to get dual citizenship, right? 

Wrong. 

Unfortunately, Japan doesn’t offer dual citizenship to their nationals. 

Now, as an adult, this is often a point of internal contention for me. Do I surrender my citizenship in my birthplace to where I call home now? Or do I hold out in hopes Japan will eventually give me dual citizenship? 

Of course, it would make absolute sense to get citizenship in the country I am a resident of — but it is also difficult to let go of the sentimentality of my heritage and background. I must also keep in mind other complications of being a permanent resident as well, seeing as how I am politically completely obsolete: I hold no grounds or rights to cast votes either in Canada or in Japan. 

Perhaps it is easy for me to say, I acknowledge this, as someone who lives in a city where multiculturalism and acceptance of diverse populations is the norm (not the exception), but it seems incredibly outdated, unpopular and preposterous to bar people from holding multiple citizenship. It is my personal belief that it is discouraging to an attitude of global unity and harmony to continue to uphold this stringent, exclusive school of thought. 

I fully acknowledge and recognize that my citizenship doesn’t define my heritage, ethnicity or identity. This, of course, is the rational logic that anyone can arrive at with due time. But all the same, I struggle. 

Perhaps, this comes from years of trying to stay afloat in school where I never saw faces like mine. Though I am shamefaced and embarrassed to admit it now, many of my formative years were spent wishing I was white just so I could “belong.” Even now, even though I take pride in being of Sri Lankan and Japanese heritage (and happily claim a Canadian identity), there are moments where I feel displaced. 

When I go back to either Japan or Sri Lanka, I am routinely told that I don’t resemble their people — which is a factual reality. Then, when I am in Canada, I am often asked what ethnicity I am, and then informed I don’t look Japanese or Sri Lankan. It’s all true and I take no issue in confronting the truth. 

But all the same, there are times in my life, I have wistfully wished I looked like I resemble a singular community — easily blending into the background instead of feeling like a flamboyant emblem of “mixed heritage.” 

My experience is further complicated by the realities of my heritage as well. 

In Japan, there is often a hierarchical viewpoint of mixed Japanese people. While ideally people are to be exclusively and fully Japanese, if one is to be of mixed ethnicity, there is no discrimination if you are an “invisible” multi-ethnic person (i.e. Korean or Chinese mixed with Japanese) — unless you claim your other heritage. And then past that, if you have darker skin, you may be subject to further discrimination. 

Often, people who look different in Japan are not treated kindly, and many half-Japanese children will verbalize their ordeals with bullying and prejudice due to their appearance growing up.

And the reality is, I get equally stared at in Sri Lanka as well. But while in Japan, my dark skin is possibly disadvantageous for me, I am considered to be “light skinned” in South Asia — the beauty standard. It is a complete yo-yo experience, oscillating violently from one extreme to another — all whilst occasionally feeling like a zoo animal in homogenous countries for not resembling their average citizen (I would like to firmly make sure I do not blame, nor do I hold it against, people for being curious).

Despite these drawbacks in both Japan and Sri Lanka, which I acknowledge and regard seriously, I am proud of where my parents came from and who I am. 

So, with all these occasionally tumultuous thoughts in my head, it becomes a tangled mess at times trying to weigh the pros and cons of which citizenship I should pursue. Ideally, I would be able to be a dual citizen, but I know realistically this is a long shot, despite my romanticism and emotion. 

To summarize, my final thoughts really emphasize that the sentiment behind citizenship is not as simple as the documentation and papers ostensibly appear to be. How we identify, where our political loyalties lie, and whom we sympathize with cannot be recognized simply by what we are registered as. 

For this topic, I am not entirely sure I have a perfect, cookie-cutter finale to end on, except maybe this: no matter what, we are all so much more than simply our ethnicity, heritage and race. But they are definitely a part of what makes us who we are, and there is nothing wrong in holding pride and honour in being part of a community — this is universal to the human experience. 

And as we progress further into a more globalized community, I think it has become more crucial than ever to understand how to co-exist with diverse communities and societies, respecting their differences whilst fostering harmonious relationships. As long as we are not harming ourselves or anyone else, we are all just people deserving the same basic human rights and respect. 

I am a citizen of Japan and a permanent resident of Canada with Japanese and Sri Lankan heritage, but above all this — I am just me. 

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My name is Eri Ikezawa and I have an extended minor in psychology and a major in linguistics. I’m still on the path to quelling questions about myself and the direction I want to head in, but in the meantime, I have always wanted to find a way to help others and contribute to a community dedicated to personal development and self-love.