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Mariana Reis (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer 

Resilience is the ability to bounce back from adversity, adapt and continue pursuing your goals, even when faced with challenging situations. In truth, I consider myself very resilient. Throughout my life, both in distant and recent times, I have encountered many situations that required me to “toughen up” and keep going. I’ve lost jobs, moved countries, had a child during the COVID-19 pandemic, lost my grandfather, lost a dog and, most painfully, lost my father. Yet, despite all this adversity, I have managed to keep moving forward. There were moments when I felt hopeless and insecure, but I never gave up. That, to me, is resilience. 

When I look back, I can see many situations that could have made me give up, but I continued to move forward despite many adversities. However, the thing I missed most during difficult times was support. I think I learned to do everything on my own and lost the ability to reach out for help, and that made everyone around me believe I had everything under control. But, ironically, it was in the moments when I appeared the bravest when I needed support the most. The hardest thing about resilience is that you appear to be brave and tough, and people become convinced that you don’t need help, creating an endless cycle where how people see you is different from reality, and the braver you appear, the lonelier you get. 

Thankfully, during my most vulnerable moments, when I swallowed any fear I had of reaching out and managed to find the support network I needed, it made all the difference. Reaching out for help wasn’t easy, but it brought the immense relief of knowing I wasn’t alone. When I spoke about my fears, they became smaller. I also realized that others were going through similar struggles, which made me feel less isolated. I connected with women’s circles and mother’s groups to help me through postpartum depression. When my father passed away, I reached out to friends who offered their love and kindness. These moments of support were transformative and gave me the strength to keep going. 

Opening up not only brought me comfort, but also deepened my sense of belonging. I became more attuned to the needs of others and felt a stronger sense of duty towards my community. I wanted to share the support I had received and pass it on to others. There is a fine line between resilience and support, and it lies in our ability to both seek and offer help. Sometimes, being strong and navigating difficulties alone isn’t the best course of action—it’s incredibly lonely. When we close ourselves off from the world, the world closes itself off to us, and our barriers become so thick that we struggle to reach out for help. This is when resilience can act more as a curse than a blessing, reminding us that we need to ask for help so that others know what we need. 

Moreover, because of how people perceive us, help may not always arrive when we need it most. If we constantly show ourselves as strong and self-sufficient, people may hesitate to offer help, unsure if their gesture will be welcomed. The truth is, we can’t do everything by ourselves. What we often lack is the courage to open up, seek help and let others see our vulnerabilities. Asking for help doesn’t make us less resilient; resilience isn’t about doing it alone—it’s about finding constructive ways to overcome adversity and move forward.

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My name is Mariana and I am a holistic nutritionist. I love helping other immigrant mothers by cooking nutritious meals to support their postpartum recovery. As I walk the path of self-discovery and inner reconnection, my hope is to continue forging meaningful connections and seeking opportunities to support and uplift others.