Jump

April 14, 2021

Plunging through the troposphere, Low Entropy Volunteer Writer Nicole Riglietti found a perfect metaphor for the eye-opening act of turning your dreams into action.

 

I keep putting immense pressure on myself. Pressure to grow up. To make realistic choices in life. To have one foot in a life full of security and the other foot pursuing my passions. To walk the safe road in life or walk the one less travelled, carving out my own path, with hard-work, grit and honesty. Is there a balance? Someone once told me not to take life too seriously. How can I not, when the choices we make in life lead us to either greatness or emptiness?

 

I constantly keep taking jobs that lead me further away from the yearning desires within me. Jobs where I fearfully sell my soul for a paycheck instead of feed my soul with pure joy, honouring myself. I say, screw the fear. I’m tired of giving in to the fear of established, long-lasting security. To be honest, I don’t even think that really exists. Fear does. Fear is an innate human instinct, it’s part of the human experience. It can protect us. It hinders us. Fear allows the roaring courage within us to rise and face that which we cannot see. 

 

I went skydiving. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do, to experience in my life. I craved the thrilling adventure that would ignite the adrenaline of life itself, sending shock waves through my very existence. Of course, I was nervous and terrified as each moment inched closer and closer to the drop. I was a crockpot of emotions, my heart pounding outside of myself, and I’m proud to say the excitement of it all won the battle over the fear. It was time to get on the plane and I’m thinking to myself, Okay . . . Okay, this is happening. I can do this. Take off. I’m safe on the plane, with all my gear on, and the door slides open, and people begin to jump out, except from my point of view it didn’t look like jumping, it looked like people were being sucked out of the plane. In a blink of an eye, one by one they were gone, leaving clear blue skies in my eyeline, with a loud whistling sound of air pressure rushing into the cabin and dulling my senses. My turn. I scooted my butt to the edge of the plane’s open door, my legs and feet dangling off the side into nothingness. I stretched my arms to either side, gripping the frame of the plane, holding on for dear life with my shaky, sweaty palms. There’s no sense in this. Why would anyone do this?! Those panicked thoughts raced through my mind with great speed, like Usain Bolt running the 100 metres in the Olympics. My tandem skydiver literally peeled my hands from the frame and crossed my arms over my chest, and we were off, plunging, free falling into the sky, sinking fast as gravity yanked me down with its strong hold, slicing me through the clouds. Those 20-30 seconds of free-falling were the most terrifying thrill, I didn’t even know what was happening. Once the parachute went up, jolting us to a soar, I was able to breathe and appreciate the beauty of creation below and all around me. The mountains to my side, the glistening Pacific ahead of me outlining the surrounding land below, the city stretched out as if it were all Lego formed together by a child’s imagination. I was floating among the clouds, beaming, soaring, smiling, flying with the birds. I was breathing, living, excited to be alive and just taking everything in. 

 

I guess what I’m beginning to realize is, in life the active choice to follow your dreams and pursue your passions is like jumping out of an airplane. It’s utterly terrifying. It’s illuminating excitement. It’s sheer panic and trembling fear. It’s free-falling and liberating. 

 

I could find a secure career, a good-paying, stable job because it’s time to grow up and be an actual adult, only to find that I hate it and myself, becoming miserable at best with the nine-to-five routine, as my soul is craving something else, whispering to me, hoping one day I’ll actually listen. I’d rather have the courage to actively pursue my dreams, follow my heart and turn those dreams into a reality. The dreaming all day, every day at an unfulfilling job makes me unhappy, to say the least. Taking the initial steps fills my insides with fear and crippling anxiety, and then I slowly fall into it and find my way. At the end of the day, at the end of my life, I want to look back and see how I had the courage to try – that I had the courage to be who I am, and most importantly, the courage to be true to who I am. 

 

Head on over to a Low Entropy meeting, or mosey on over to the comments section or any of our social media accounts to let us know about a time you pushed through your fears to witness the beauty on the other side.

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