Dating in the 21st Century

November 21, 2021

Terence MacLaine (he/him/his), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

Back in the day, we didn’t have apps like Tinder, Bumble, etc . . .

 

If you wanted to meet someone, you had to make the effort of actually going outside & socializing with others where/when you would learn the art of human interaction & social cues like manners, body language, courtesy, etc . . .

 

But to form relationships, you had to go out to social gatherings like clubs, bars & parties.

 

Today, we see and treat each other as little more than items. And not as in: “You two are an item.” I mean literally as items that we select off a shelf from a grocery store with no more consideration than the price. 

 

This is the average date today: Swipe till you like. You both match. Text to meet. Meet at their place. Ghost. Next, please . . .

 

It’s that simple. And that tragic. 

 

This ghosting thing, that’s the real watermark of today. Part of the cost of a relationship, or just hookup, used to be the breakup scene. You (some at least) had to consider the feelings of the other person if/when you didn’t want to see the other person anymore. You had to call them, or at least leave them a note the next morning, but there was some personal accountability at least.

 

Now, you simply ghost with no consideration of the other person’s feelings, simply because it’s easier. No thought of what or how the other person may feel. They have no way of knowing what they did wrong. Or if you’re even alive. You could have been in an accident, or run over – who knows? But rather than considering the feelings of the other person, we just instantly cut the line, sometimes causing YEARS of emotional scarring. All because you couldn’t be bothered.

 

No wonder the world is such a mess today. How can we be happy when we treat each other like that? When our socializing & interacting with each other is reduced to words on a phone, how could it possibly get worse? We’ve taken the human out of humanity & replaced it with algorithms. We ARE the machine.

 

I leave you then with one last scenario, witnessed by yours truly a few years ago. A local coffee shop was hosting a singles day, which on the surface seemed like a great idea. I happened to walk by & saw the shop was pretty much full with every seat taken. Obviously, the idea was a success. 

 

I looked in & what I saw was people sitting across from each other, each and every one of them texting with someone instead of interacting with the person sitting across from them.

 

At no time have we ever been more connected.

 

And yet, at no time have we ever been so alone.

 

Terence MacLaine is a writer and blogger from Vancouver, BC. He has a lifetime of experiences set against the backdrop of beautiful British Columbia, and brings his stories to the world in his blog, The Adventures of Yesteryear (theadventureofmemories.wordpress.com).

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