Choosing to Forgive

March 10, 2023

Elizaveta Garifullina (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

Forgiveness is one of a person’s most essential abilities that can make them happy. All of us are initially capable of forgiveness. It's just that some people choose not to forgive. This is a choice, and we are all responsible for it.

Our life is filled with lessons, and life experience can be challenging. There are a lot of people in our lives who have changed us in some way. Take a look back at your life up to this point. Many people have made you smile and laugh. Some even taught you to love or taught you friendship. But there are also those people who have caused you tears and taught you pain, separation, and resentment. But is this a less valuable experience? Despite how much pain these people have caused you, find the courage and bravery to forgive them. Find the love to thank them for the experience they have brought into your life. They taught you a lot and discovered something in you that you didn't know about.

Also, of course, you can forgive them, not for them, but for yourself. Forgiveness is not only a path to mental and spiritual healing, but also physical. Studies have shown that the act of forgiveness can reduce the risk of heart attack, reduce blood pressure, improve immune function, and reduce levels of anxiety, depression, and stress.

Forgiveness can genuinely help you free yourself. When you hold a grudge, you are still attached to the person who hurt you, though they may not have been in your life for many years. With a farewell, you will let go of this pain, let go of this person, and live freely. Get rid of what is hurting you. You don't have to live with this scar anymore.

There is one small three-letter tactic that can help with this. Dedicate the first letter to how exactly this person has hurt you. Describe all your resentment, all the pain without choosing expressions. Write out absolutely everything, all the most unpleasant things. Then seal the letter in an envelope and hide it in a drawer. The next day you will need to write a second letter and write out everything that was not specified in the previous one. And put the envelope in the drawer. The next day you write a third letter. There should be forgiveness and gratitude in it for such a valuable life lesson. Describe what benefits you have derived from this, even if it is difficult to do so at first glance. Then all three envelopes need to be burned (of course, observing the safety rules).

Pain and resentment live in our bodies and poison everything around, polluting our minds. It prevents us from living. Take care of yourself, make your life better. Sometimes, it can be extremely complicated to forgive a person, especially if this person was very close or it is difficult for you to forgive them for this act. In this case, it is better to work with a therapist. Forgiveness does not mean that you will start contacting this person again. If it is easier for you not to come into contact with them anymore – that is your choice; rely on your feelings. The main thing is to let go of the resentment that has remained in your heart.


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One thought on “Choosing to Forgive

  1. “Pain and resentment live in our bodies and poison everything around, polluting our minds. It prevents us from living.” – I am going to take this with me because I relate to this a lot. I love this very article; thank you for this.

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