Tag: Survival

Mentorship and the Benefits of Seeking Help

Posted on by andrew

Heidi Collie (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

Believed to have originated from a character in the epic Greek poem The Odyssey, the term “mentor” is generally understood as an “advisor.” A quick Google search also surfaces the phrases models positive behavior, and builds trust as well as the terms: teacher; confidante; counsel; sponsor. The anthropologist in me would cry if I did not express that this is also how we might, perhaps, define the term community. At the crux of it, humans need one another and this has always been and –fighting the rise of Western neoliberalism– will always be the case.

Take a walk with me. The names “Nariokotome boy” and “Java Boy” may resonate with you very little or perhaps not at all. These are famous remains of ancient humans, more specifically Homo Ergaster (in Kenya) and Homo Erectus (in Georgia) respectively – dating back to approximately 1.6 million years ago. The significance of these individuals is that due to evidence of healed wounds, they represent the earliest indication of humans caring for their sick. Throughout this evolutionary stage, humans developed culture as an adaptive strategy; groups began to care for their sick and bury their dead, ensuring as many people live to reproduce as possible. Gradually, community meant more than just commensality. 1.6 million years ago, community meant survival. And it still does. 

Evolution continued, as evolution does, through homo heidelbergensis, homo neanderthalensis, and finally, homo sapiens. We learned from the successes and failures of others, each group adapting their culture and societal systems to fit the surrounding environment and circumstances. Today we see community displayed in a diverse range of social group configurations and systems of kinship around the world. 

This sense of community is not just laid out spatially, geographically, but also temporally. Sir Isaac Newton famously wrote, “If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants.” He intended to acknowledge the talented scholars who came before him but, perhaps inadvertently, struck a chord with something deeper. Newton had depended on another human just as Java Boy had, 1.6 million years earlier. The human race boasts such fantastic diversity, but one fundamental element we all have in common is each other. We are built to depend on, learn from, grow with, teach, counsel, sponsor other people, just as we would have them to us. If a mentor is someone we are to learn from, based on their own behavior, don’t question who is a mentor to you. Look around you and ask who –in one way or another– isn’t a mentor to you.

They (the Instagram wellness community) say you become like the five people you spend the most time around. Well, –and no offense to my roommates, boss or local barista– in my case this is not ideal. In my opinion this is also fundamentally not true. Breathe a sigh of relief and feel free to stop hanging around at the gym, you don’t need to refine the spaces you are in, or scour Facebook marketplace for new friends. You are not defined by your physical five, but rather the decisions you make about what you consume and produce, influenced by your mentorship community. Looking beyond my postcode area, where I work as a barista there are several hundred customers, 70 thousand students at my school and 30 million users on Tiktok – so don’t tell me I am going to become my roommates because I walk in on them in the washroom and occasionally steal their bread. In the most human way possible, we all have 7.7 billion mentors, each for us to learn from their successes or failures. Humanity’s greatest gift is itself, and just as 1.6 million years ago we began to carry our sick, trust that your community will carry you. You only have to ask.

 

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Leave your thoughts for Heidi in the comments below — better yet, start up a dialogue with the Low Entropy community in person at a Conscious Connections meeting or online at our community site. You can also follow us on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, Twitter and YouTube to stay up-to-date with Low Entropy news!

 

Bright Spots in Horrible Days

Posted on by andrew

Ananya Rajkumar (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

I have always been a very anxious person. It doesn’t exactly help that university life is very stressful and that for the last two years, everyone has been trying to survive a pandemic. Many people struggled with their mental health during this time, and unfortunately I was one of them. I was in my senior year of high school when the world went into a lockdown, and because of this I never had a graduation, or a prom or even my first year of university. To some this might not seem like a big deal, and honestly a part of me didn’t care too much about things like prom, but it didn’t change the fact that I felt like I’d missed big developmental milestones in my life. I was 18 years old, and instead of going out into the world and discovering myself, I was at home and struggling through online learning. I had never felt so alone and lost. I became depressed and more anxious than I had ever been, and the worst part was that I had no idea how to cope.

 

This was when I fell in love with reading. I would immerse myself in fictional worlds and live vicariously through their characters because I couldn’t handle the pressures in my real life. My brother would make comments like, “Why are you so sad? Everyone is going through the pandemic, you are not the only one,” which was ridiculous. Just because many others might be experiencing the same thing doesn’t diminish your own pain.

 

At the time though, what he said really got to me, because there were a lot of people who thrived in the pandemic, who took this pause to better themselves or take some much-needed rest. I criticized myself for not being like them. I always had a more negative mindset, but that never used to bother me until then.

 

All in all, it was a tough year, but I was so grateful for my mom, who was so understanding and encouraged me to talk to someone, and for my friends, who made me feel less alone because they felt the same way. I am also grateful for the Low Entropy community, which I joined because my own experience made me passionate about advocating for mental health and self-betterment. 

 

It’s around a year later and I am so much happier now, school is back in person, and I am living in a student house and trying to enjoy everyday life. The biggest change was not external but more internal, and it was because I adopted a different perspective. I stopped having these extremely high expectations of how life should be and tried to find happiness in the small things, like getting my favorite coffee, watching the sunset as I walk home, talking to my parents on the phone or maybe reading a good book. I would look at my days as a collection of little moments, some good and some bad, but either way I would try to enjoy them. I really tried to fall in love with life, no matter what it looked like. 

 

I was inspired to write this article for a long time, but what finally spurred me to type was a text I received from my mom. I had a very stressful weekend and had just completed a very hard midterm which did not go so well, but instead of letting it crush me, I chose to focus on how I could do better next time and the things I could do to enjoy that day. This is what I had told my mom when she asked me how I was feeling the next morning, and her response made me smile. 

 

“Good job getting through yesterday. It’s important to enjoy the difficult days as well . . . funny, but that’s a secret I discovered.”

 

Her message reminded me of how much I’d grown in the past year, and how there are not only bright spots in horrible days, but how sometimes we can appreciate hardships too, since they are what make us grow as people. 

I am happy that the world is starting to heal, but if you’d asked me a year ago if I wished the pandemic never happened, I would have agreed without a doubt. Now, though a part of me still mourns what could have been, I am grateful for the things I’ve learned about myself and the person I am today. No matter what the future holds, I know that I will still try and find a way to love life, and I hope you all will too.

 

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My name is Ananya Rajkumar, and I am a third-year life science student at McMaster University. Some of my hobbies include reading, drinking overpriced coffee and creating anything from works of writing to new recipes. I am passionate about advocating for mental health and hopefully by sharing my journey and thoughts through blog writing, I can help create change.