Month: December 2020

It’s (Still) a Wonderful Life

Posted on by dev_team

It’s free, priceless, and good for the soul: this festive season, Low Entropy Volunteer Writer Catherine Pulgar reminds us to give ourselves the gift of gratitude.

Christmas Christmas!!!

 I know that I am not the only one eagerly anticipating the most beautiful time of the year. At least for me, Christmas represents love, family, and friendship. I know 2020 has been a challenging year, nowhere near the one we all hoped for in the final minutes of 2019. However, Christmas has always been a perfect moment to reflect on the past year and remind ourselves to feel gratitude.  

I’m grateful that my family is safe and healthy in a year such as this. Even though they live in another country and won’t be travelling to visit me in Canada anytime soon, I’m just happy we will have time together in the years to come. 

Christmas is the most memorable season for me. Since I was a little girl, I remember my grandparents, uncles, aunts and cousins gathering together to celebrate the season. I grew up playing with my cousins and waiting for Santa Claus every December 24th. Sadly, for the past six years, we have not been able to keep this tradition. Due to political problems in our home country of Venezuela, most of my family emigrated across the globe, to places like the U.S., Peru, Argentina, Chile, and Europe. I know how difficult it is to celebrate holidays alone or differently. 

This year Christmas looks different for everybody due to the current world situation, but this will not be forever. A new year is coming full of unique moments. My message to every person reading this post is to stay safe this holiday: it may look different or be more uncomfortable than previous years, but it will not remain this way. New Christmases will come, full of family and friends, and with a lot of food and eggnog.

In my case, I’m working to set up everything I need to have a tremendous Christmas. I’m planning a Zoom meeting with my family, I’m buying ingredients to prepare my traditional food, and I’m grateful that I’m healthy enough to do this with them. 

I hope that you have a fantastic Christmas season.

If you find yourself struggling this time of year, here are some coping strategies, and please don’t hesitate to reach out to individuals and organizations who can offer you emotional support.

From all of us here at Low Entropy, we wish you the happiest of holidays and a brilliant new year.

Hiking Uphill: Depression and the Importance of Pushing Forward

Posted on by dev_team

Mired in depression, Low Entropy Volunteer Writer Kathy Woudzia found herself inspired by a tough hike and an iconic slogan.

There has been a dark cloud hovering over me for the past several weeks. Sometimes, it immobilizes me. Writing is hard.

It amazes me that my mind is so much more powerful than my physical self: I am capable of pushing my body to extreme limits through exercise, yet there are days my mind prevents me from not only completing, but even starting the least physically taxing activity. Lately, I have little interest in doing anything.

Though COVID-19 has certainly made life more challenging, I think a part of this depression stems from my new life as an empty nester. Kids – all moved out. Husband – gone. I built my life around family, and now they don’t need me anymore. What is a person who gave up their career for family to do during a pandemic?

Volunteer work is next to impossible to find. What little there is, is online, and so solitary. A job? Who’s going to hire someone who left the workforce more than 18 years ago? I built a life around cooking, cleaning, looking after kids, shopping and working out. With only myself to look after, there is no longer a need – much less a desire – to do any of those past activities, with the exception of exercising. 

I awake in the morning with a pit of anxiety in my stomach. What am I going to do to fill all the hours the day has to offer? That anxiety spirals into a well of depression, where I am no longer motivated to do some of the things I used to love to do: reading, writing, and even exercising become nearly impossible. Without these activities, I spiral deeper into depression – it’s a vicious cycle.

When I do have an activity planned, I find it difficult to follow through. I find myself partaking in compulsive behaviours that are detrimental to my health. I overeat, for example, only to immediately regret it, something I never did six months ago.

My mind is in a haze most of the time. I have no personality, and nothing to say because I don’t do anything meaningful all day long. I used to be the talkative one in the room; now I don’t have anything to contribute to the conversation.

I’ve been listening to audiobooks on mental toughness that encourage me to do activities that I know will make me feel better afterwards, so I signed up for a Saturday group hike. Hiking is a physical test, but believe me, it took all of my mental strength to get there.

Even though I knew I was more than physically capable of completing the climb, mentally I was not prepared. I awoke at 6 a.m. to ready myself for this event. I began with meditation. Then, three impulsive cups of coffee. I begrudgingly packed my backpack in a fog of self doubt. Worried I was forgetting something, I packed and repacked my bag several times. I took my dog out for his morning walk, and when we returned home I felt frozen to the spot. Minutes turned into an hour . . . it was time to go. I knew that if I didn’t get in my car at that moment, I would miss the hike, so I took on the attitude that Nike is so famously known for: just do it.

I arrived on time at the base of Grouse Mountain, gathering with a group of 25 hikers from meetup.com. I immediately felt better; just knowing I’d gotten myself up there was a major feat. The leader decided to take a difficult new route called the Flint & Feather Trail. I had been hiking the regular Grouse Grind during the summer, so this was a welcome change. It was challenging and exhilarating, and the views were spectacular. I had a lot of fun and was happy I partook in it. When we finished, I felt intoxicated with euphoria and proud that I had mustered the mental courage to join the group.  

Mental health is a difficult thing. Struggling through depression is far more arduous than anything physical that I have had to endure. Mental toughness means overcoming the voices in your head that tell you that you can’t do something. Physically, your body can do anything, but if those voices make you feel incapable, they can leave you mentally paralyzed. I have to avoid overthinking things every minute of every day, and in everything I try to do. It has been a challenge, but for me, the most important step is, truly, to just do it.

Let us know in the comments which activities bring positivity to your day, or better yet, drop in on a Low Entropy virtual meet-up to join others as we trek along life’s winding trails.