Month: November 2021

Unless

Posted on by andrew

Anna Bernsteiner (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

Yesterday I didn’t get out of my bed at all.

I stared at the ceiling.

And it looked like I was still, doing nothing 

When actually there were thousands of conversations and words 

Floating through my mind

so I was paralyzed and had to listen to them scream.

 

Time felt worthless and so the days passed

And another one and another one and many more after. 

And this would have gone on for eternity 

Sadness and depression can eat you alive 

 

Unless . . .

There is something in you that wants to move. 

Unless . . .

There is something that wants to run, dance, laugh

Unless

there is something that will fight 

 

All you need is a beating heart

And a fighting soul

To rebuild your life. 

Nothing can stop you

Not grief, not pain, not depression

 

You are in control of your reality

You can 

You will. 

 

So today I got out of bed in the morning. 

It took me all the strength I had 

But I made it

And so will you. 

 

—

 

Hi, I’m Anna, I’m a student and I write blogs for Low Entropy. In my free time I like to explore new countries and cultures, try new foods, languages and meet new people, and I try to write interesting articles 🙂

 

Discomfort

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Terence MacLaine (he/him/his), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

Comfort.

 

We all seek it. We all want to be comfortable. But what about DIScomfort? Is it a bad thing? Is it always undesirable? Our brains, for the most part, are conditioned to regard words with “dis” preceding them to be negative. And often, if only subconsciously, anything negative is looked upon unfavorably. But is it so with discomfort?

 

Let’s examine some scenarios.

 

Scenario number one:

 

Kyle is 23, single, and has difficulty forming meaningful relationships. He has squandered many opportunities because of the uncertainty of the outcome. Like most of us, he wishes it was simple, but in his mind, he figures he faces at least a 50 per cent chance of rejection. It is this fear that has held Kyle back. The fear of stepping out of his own comfort zone. He realizes he is being held back by his unwillingness to leave his comfort zone and has decided to try something different.

 

Kyle works with Erin, who is also single. He enjoys working with her and wants to get to know her outside of the office. He has envisioned all kinds of scenarios in which to approach her, but he has yet to act on it. Kyle is at a crossroads. 

 

He realizes he can either risk feeling uncomfortable by asking Erin out, or continue to wonder what might have been. Kyle eventually asks Erin out for coffee, and she accepts. 

 

In this instance, Kyle is rewarded by facing discomfort, which in turn has the added benefit of helping him grow as a person as well.

 

Scenario number two:

 

Winnie has been with her company for over three years. Like Kyle, she too is at a crossroads. She feels she deserves a raise, yet is afraid to upset her boss by asking for one. Winnie has also noticed she is beginning to feel unrecognized for all her hard work and has come to the conclusion that the only way for her to move forward is to ask for a raise, or continue to languish away. She knows that in order for her to succeed, she will need to be uncomfortable.

 

Winnie ultimately decides to ask for a raise and is rewarded for her efforts. Once again, we see discomfort as a motivating factor. Discomfort, like any other fear, can be a healthy thing.

 

It is nature’s way of telling us we are in dangerous or unfamiliar territory. But it can also be the springboard for growth. Personal growth. This is to take nothing away from comfort, as it too has its purpose. But too much comfort can also be dangerous, for if there is no struggle, there is no growth. No progress. 

 

Ultimately, it comes down to your perception of discomfort, and how you choose to approach it. You can try to avoid it whenever possible. But at what cost? Or, you can use it as an opportunity to better yourself.

 

As the saying goes: do something once a day that scares you.

 

Do it twice when it doesn’t.

 

—

 

Terence MacLaine is a writer and blogger from Vancouver, BC. He has a lifetime of experiences set against the backdrop of beautiful British Columbia, and brings his stories to the world in his blog, The Adventures of Yesteryear (theadventureofmemories.wordpress.com).

Dating in the 21st Century

Posted on by andrew

Terence MacLaine (he/him/his), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

Back in the day, we didn’t have apps like Tinder, Bumble, etc . . .

 

If you wanted to meet someone, you had to make the effort of actually going outside & socializing with others where/when you would learn the art of human interaction & social cues like manners, body language, courtesy, etc . . .

 

But to form relationships, you had to go out to social gatherings like clubs, bars & parties.

 

Today, we see and treat each other as little more than items. And not as in: “You two are an item.” I mean literally as items that we select off a shelf from a grocery store with no more consideration than the price. 

 

This is the average date today: Swipe till you like. You both match. Text to meet. Meet at their place. Ghost. Next, please . . .

 

It’s that simple. And that tragic. 

 

This ghosting thing, that’s the real watermark of today. Part of the cost of a relationship, or just hookup, used to be the breakup scene. You (some at least) had to consider the feelings of the other person if/when you didn’t want to see the other person anymore. You had to call them, or at least leave them a note the next morning, but there was some personal accountability at least.

 

Now, you simply ghost with no consideration of the other person’s feelings, simply because it’s easier. No thought of what or how the other person may feel. They have no way of knowing what they did wrong. Or if you’re even alive. You could have been in an accident, or run over – who knows? But rather than considering the feelings of the other person, we just instantly cut the line, sometimes causing YEARS of emotional scarring. All because you couldn’t be bothered.

 

No wonder the world is such a mess today. How can we be happy when we treat each other like that? When our socializing & interacting with each other is reduced to words on a phone, how could it possibly get worse? We’ve taken the human out of humanity & replaced it with algorithms. We ARE the machine.

 

I leave you then with one last scenario, witnessed by yours truly a few years ago. A local coffee shop was hosting a singles day, which on the surface seemed like a great idea. I happened to walk by & saw the shop was pretty much full with every seat taken. Obviously, the idea was a success. 

 

I looked in & what I saw was people sitting across from each other, each and every one of them texting with someone instead of interacting with the person sitting across from them.

 

At no time have we ever been more connected.

 

And yet, at no time have we ever been so alone.

 

—

Terence MacLaine is a writer and blogger from Vancouver, BC. He has a lifetime of experiences set against the backdrop of beautiful British Columbia, and brings his stories to the world in his blog, The Adventures of Yesteryear (theadventureofmemories.wordpress.com).

Words

Posted on by andrew

Anna Bernsteiner (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

I have been writing my whole life. When I was seven I wrote a story about five cat superheroes who saved the world. It never got to be the bestseller I wanted it to be, but it makes me laugh out loud when I look at it now. 

 

I always just wanted to get all the words out of my head. You see, I, like so many others in this social media society, think way too much. If you could hear what’s going on in there you would understand. So since I can write, I write. I don’t really think I’m particularly good at it, but it makes me calm and feel like anything is possible. Because paper is patient. And I don’t need to filter what I write, I can just go for it. Everything that comes out lands on that white piece of paper. It’s patient and not very judgmental.

 

I have written stories with 200 pages and sometimes poems that have just one line. I have tried writing about events that are true and about things that aren’t. I moved the lines, created, destroyed, switched languages. You name it, I have tried it. 

 

So I’m just following the words that my head arranges and bringing them to paper. One word at a time. You don’t need to be particularly good at something to do it. If it makes you happy, go for it. 

 

And every time I start, I feel a little bit better afterward. The plan was to create a range of words that people would enjoy. I used to want to write a bestseller, and now I’m just excited if one person is touched by what I write. And that person, most of the time, is my mum and sometimes my dad, and that makes my day.

 

Recently the world went upside down and a range of events in my life left me wordless. Something that I have never experienced before. The words used to flow out like water in a stream but there was nothing. Just like people were leaving, the words did too. And I didn’t write for months. They took my words away.  

 

Of course, I could have sat down and started writing random words but I had no story, nothing to say, no excitement like I used to. And it took a long time to finally get back to where I left off. 

 

So why am I writing this now? For no reason at all but for you to see that words are powerful. Out in the world, in a group, on paper or spoken from one person to another. What you say or write will be repeated inside some minds multiple times. Words can destroy or rebuild. 

 

Words can make a big difference. They do for me.

 

—

 

Hi, I’m Anna, I’m a student and I write blogs for Low Entropy. In my free time I like to explore new countries and cultures, try new foods, languages and meet new people, and I try to write interesting articles 🙂

Lines in the Sand

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Kanak Khatri, Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

Have you ever thought, “That was too much. It was unfair, toxic and just not something that I deserved?”

 

I have felt the same. The 28-year-old me really wants to go back in time and help the 12-year-old, 13-year-old and so many other past versions of me draw boundaries and stand up for themselves, because they did not know any better.

 

Now that I know how important setting boundaries is, I want to spread the message. However, I really want to go back in time and gauge why I was having difficulty. Well, the reasons were simple: I was not educated by my teachers or parents, nor was I confident and mature enough to develop that kind of wisdom on my own. I was taught, and thought, this is how it is, I guess I must suffer. And so there I was, in a repetitive cycle of lacking the confidence to keep people from pushing my limits, which in turn further deteriorated my confidence.

 

For people who find this whole scenario a little too familiar, it’s time to set those boundaries straight and strong, such that people become afraid of even being tempted to put your limits to the test. Initially, it might seem like an impossible task, but it might help to start by saying no to the people who seem to take advantage of you, are toxic to you or are bullying you.

 

For instance, say no to that person who only remembers you when they need a favour. And that person who tells you are not good enough, tell them that you are good enough, for yourself and for the people who love you. Slowly but surely you all will find yourself surrounded by healthy boundaries. For me, my manager does not bother me unnecessarily, because well, she got an answer when she did. People think twice before messing with me. My mother, to date, tells me to not get into arguments even for the right reasons, but I guess I grew out of the beliefs that were ingrained in me as a child.

 

Please, please and please, teachers and parents, inculcate healthy boundaries in young minds from the start. Help them be more confident and realise their full potential. And to anyone reading this who does not struggle with boundaries, please be kind. Let’s build a world where we empower each other.

 

To my warriors out there, defend your boundaries, make people scared to mess with you. You don’t owe your life to anybody else. You owe it to yourself to keep yourself happy and healthy by setting happy, healthy boundaries: you can do it.

 

—

Leave your thoughts for Kanak in the comments below — better yet, start up a dialogue with the Low Entropy community in person at a Conscious Connections meeting or online at our community site. You can also follow us on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, Twitter and YouTube to stay up-to-date with Low Entropy news!

The Problem with Goodbyes

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Bethany Howell (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

I have always had trouble letting go. For as long as I can remember, I have held onto the past far too tightly, distracting me from the present. Saying goodbye has been especially difficult for me: the finality of it was far too much for my naïve mind to take. Once someone was gone, there could be no more conversations, no more gentle touches, no more time spent in each other’s company. I can recall doing just about anything I could think of to be able to spend five more minutes with my best friend or one more night at summer camp. Yet, no matter how hard I fought, I would always end up having to say goodbye through tear-clouded eyes.

 

Leaving was tough, not only because the good times were over, but also because I knew they would always be held within my memory. I could replay the time I had over and over in my mind, yet I could never truly relive it. As time marches on, memory fades. What used to be recalled in vibrant colour dulls with each passing year. However, with this, the wounds left by those who had bid farewell began to heal. Scars remained, but the pain subsided.

 

As I grew, I began to accept the small losses, but I was still unable to shrug off the greater issues. I lost my closest friend nearly a year ago. She had chosen to become involved with situations that hurt her and left me when I could no longer support her. I wish I could say that I never blamed myself, but to do so would be a lie. I spent months gathering evidence for what I had done wrong – reversing time in my mind and replaying scenarios to figure out how to ‘fix it.’ There was, of course, no way to resolve this issue. My family and my partner assured me that I had done the best I could and that I held on longer than most friends would have, yet I still hung onto what had happened, never letting myself forget the small mistakes I had made.

 

I realize now that it was never really saying goodbye that I had an issue with, nor was it losing those close to me. The hardest part was what was left after the fact. The hardest part was knowing that it will never really be over and that the goodbye was not the grand finale I had hoped for.

 

Love haunts us. It leaves remnants of itself on everything it touches. I know now that certain books, films, even clothes still bear the name of those who have already said their goodbyes. I cannot help but be reminded of those who have hurt me and those who had to leave far too soon, but I can choose to not let it affect me negatively. Life will always be filled with memories, both good and bad. It is a curse, yes, but it is also one of the greatest parts of living. Without the bad memories, how could we learn? Without the good, for what would we be living?

 

To truly live in the present, one has to let go of the past. That does not mean totally forgetting what has occurred, but instead remembering and accepting it. Memories may have the power to overtake us, but we also have the power to use them. I am still working towards accepting what happened between myself and my friend; however, I am no longer ashamed of what I did. Though it is a small step, I am proud of myself for trying to improve. 

 

Life can be difficult to navigate, especially when you are carrying years of baggage, but there is always hope and I am choosing to focus on the good. I do not plan on dropping all the weight of what has occurred, but I do try to lighten the load day by day. After all, acceptance is a process, not a sudden state of being. Though I am no expert on this topic by any means, I can honestly recommend acceptance of the past and focus on the present to anyone struggling with letting go.

 

—

 

My name is Bethany Howell and I am a third-year university student majoring in psychology and minoring in family and child studies. I have a passion for writing and mental health and my ultimate goal since age 13 has been to make a difference in the world through helping others, which is how I ended up here at Low Entropy!

Use Discomfort

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Amy Mueller, Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

I wish I could say discomfort was a foreign feeling. I wish I could say I haven’t sat on my couch, coffee in hand, rain bouncing off the concrete outside, with a deep gnawing ache in what feels like my soul. As I sit, a million thoughts racing through my head. How did I get here? What’s next? How will I get there? When do I start? How do I start? I am no expert, but like you, I am human. Perhaps you too have felt this feeling and had these thoughts. If so, I hope you are on the other side now. And if you are not, I have some comforting news. You are not alone and good things will come of this.

 

There are a plethora of situations that may lead us here. Perhaps you have recently lost your job, a loved one or a relationship. Or maybe you are wondering if you are happy where you are and are trying to figure out what comes next for you. Or your discomfort may be unrelated to any of these things. Maybe it is the pandemic and what feels like the polarization of the world. Maybe it is related to everyday circumstances. Maybe you are going through a particularly challenging time for none of these reasons. Wherever you are at, your reasons for feeling this way are valid. And if you find yourself relating to any of these feelings, I hope these next words are the most comforting ones you read today: You will not always feel this way. These days are temporary. They won’t last forever. This too shall pass. And somewhere deep down, while cliché, we know these words are true. They offer comfort and remind us of our strength. And sometimes that is exactly what we need.

 

I cannot promise working through your discomfort will be easy. I cannot promise it will be simple, linear or straightforward. It will be uncomfortable. But it is temporary. What I can promise you are two things: 1. You have experienced great challenges in your life outside of this. And just as you have before, you will overcome this too. You already possess the strength and tools you need to navigate this. 2. If you are being challenged, you are learning, and growth is taking place.

 

The difficult part of realizing the value in our discomfort is that we must move through it in order to get past it. I know that is not the news you wanted. In order to work through our hurt, pain, challenges, grief and every other difficult feeling/emotion, we must decide that the benefit of working through the tough stuff is greater than the comfort of remaining as we are. I can assure you, your future self will thank you for putting the work in. The path to get past discomfort, hurt and pain is through it. It’s tough, it sucks, it hurts and it is painful. You need to let yourself feel all of these things. Cry it out. Journal about it. Take deep breaths. Meditate. Talk to someone you trust. Ask for help. Make a commitment to yourself that you will do what it takes to move past where you are right now. Go slow. Be gentle with yourself. Give yourself permission to be here and be okay with it. Accept that this is a journey and it takes time. Breathe. Take things one day at a time. Take things one moment at a time if that is all you can manage right now. You will have good days. You will have hard days. You will make progress and you will take steps back. This is all part of healing and overcoming. You don’t know it yet, but this is where your strength comes from.

 

There is no time limit and there is no prescribed amount of time it will take to work through this uncomfortable place. Remember, you have the strength to navigate this situation. You possess the courage and tools you need to get to the other side. While being here, I hope every now and then you pause and reflect. Take a moment to look back at how far you have come. You will see that, as time goes on, you gain perspective. You will see things more clearly and realize things about your situation and yourself that you couldn’t see before. You will soon see things in a new light. These things are important and I hope you recognize that these are your moments of growth. In your discomfort, you will gain strength and you will gain resilience.

 

My hope is that through this process you realize, while difficult to navigate at times, discomfort is necessary to reach our true potential. It serves to show us who we really are and what we really want out of this life, and it helps put our priorities into perspective. As we continue this life journey and inevitably encounter discomfort along the way, I hope instead of resisting, you embrace it, as you recognize this feeling as growth taking place. I wish you peace, grace, compassion and strength as you navigate your journey. While it may feel as if you are on this journey alone, remind yourself: we are all navigating our own journeys, together.

 

—

 

Leave your thoughts for Amy in the comments below — better yet, start up a dialogue with the Low Entropy community in person at a Conscious Connections meeting or online at our community site. You can also follow us on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, Twitter and YouTube to stay up-to-date with Low Entropy news!

The Future . . . and How to Look Forward to It

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Tristan Goteng (he/him/his), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

The future. It is such a common term, yet it is so complex and difficult to wrap our heads around because we don’t quite understand what the future is. We don’t know what is planned for us in the future, if we can alter fate, or if the future even exists at all. That unknown causes humans to be anxious and fearful about the future. Thinking about the future is addictive, and it is hard to stop worrying. But constantly focusing on the future pulls our attention away from what is more important: the present. 

 

While I am no expert in psychology and I definitely haven’t invented a time machine, I do know some strategies to fight against the stress of the future. Every person is different, so some methods I will mention will for sure work for you, and others might not. But I have to warn you right now that the solutions in this blog aren’t just a one-time thing. Changing away from fearing the future requires dedication, reflection and mental consciousness. Don’t worry though! Even if it may seem difficult and tedious, it really isn’t. It just takes some time to get used to, but once you make a habit of these methods, you won’t notice it anymore! Hopefully, by the end of this blog, you will have learned how to avoid having fear of the future, and in turn, live your life with less stress and more joy! 

 

Alright, so where do we start? Well, I think we need to first clarify that we are not forgetting about the future. Rather, it is about not overthinking it. Avoiding the future completely doesn’t help, because it just makes every moment an unprepared panic. That is why I recommend creating two planners: one yearly calendar for important events, and one weekly/daily planner for routines and specific details. The key to this is organization. Being organized without being obsessed over the future is very important to reducing fear. Organization is knowing ahead of time what you have to do; it is planning ahead so everything goes smoothly and then leaving it be. Being obsessed is planning ahead, but then constantly thinking about your schedule or being scared that you might forget something. So how do we move away from obsession and towards organization? We write things down. Once it is on paper or your phone, it stays, so unless something needs to be desperately reordered, leave it be. That way you aren’t scared about forgetting something because it is right there in front of you like a checklist. You don’t need to doubt it because your whole day, week, even year is planned and everything will work out just as scheduled.

 

Maybe you aren’t the forgetful type, and missing out on something isn’t the reason you are scared of the future. It could be that not knowing the outcome of things causes you to fear. I can relate, because I honestly don’t know which university/college I will study at. Will I be accepted to any school? Did I do enough? What am I doing wrong? All I have to say here is to work hard. Do your best in everything you do, no matter how large or small the task is. Then you don’t have to worry, because no matter what the outcome will be, you’ll know in your heart you did all you could do, and there was nothing more that could change the results. More often than not, if you try your hardest, you will be rewarded with the outcome you wish for. However, sometimes the desired outcome simply is unattainable, and that will be easier to accept if you gave your all to it. You couldn’t control the events that happened any further, so let it be. I can promise you, once the results come in, whether good or bad, if you put your best foot forward, then you will live without regrets. 

 

If you aren’t forgetful, and you aren’t worried about the outcomes of the future, then the third most common fear of the future relates to time. Time is always ticking away, and it always feels like there is a shortage of time. We all know that the amount of time for humans is limited, and we never know when we have run out. This is probably the biggest fear in most people, and it can really take a toll on your mental health. How do we deal with this? The answer is actually more simple than you may think. Take the time to do things that you enjoy. Spend time with your family, complete your bucket list. Use the time you have and live life to the fullest. Yes, you may be thinking, “But I don’t have enough time to do these things!” You may have work, or school, or something else to do. This is why you should practice the first solution. Manage your time, and set some time aside to do enjoyable things, because you don’t want to have any regrets. You don’t have to worry about fulfilling your purpose if you take advantage of every second you have. 

 

So plan your schedule and write it down. Always work hard, no matter what you do. Make use of all the time available, and set time aside to do what you want to do before it runs out. Try them all, see which ones relate to you, and live a stress-free and fulfilling life!

 

The future can be scary, so let’s change that together. 

 

—

 

My name is Tristan Goteng, and I am currently a high school student studying at St.George’s Senior School. I love writing and helping others overcome common obstacles that block us from growing!

The Weight of Expectations

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Julia Magsombol (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

As I’m writing this right now, I tend to wonder if this piece will be good enough for the reader’s expectations. 

 

It’s been a few days since I’ve had free time. I’ve been swamped with all my university projects and other work. I barely have time to talk to people and mingle with my family at home. I mostly lose track of time, as I have a lot of things to do. I have a lot of things to write. 

 

And with all these responsibilities, I tend to ask myself, “What do you want to achieve, Julia? What are your expectations?”

 

My expectations change every year. I tend to be confused about the things I really want.

 

I knew I wanted to be in the fashion industry when I was still in high school. I expected to take fashion courses when I reached university. I expected my work to be on runways when I got older. But those expectations are all gone, as my family does not want me to pursue those dreams. They expect me to take different courses, such as nursing, dentistry, or anything else that’s not associated with art. Sadly, I dropped my dream and never pushed the expectations that I longed for.

 

As I reached the end of high school, I wanted to be a writer. I was still unsure then, but that was my main goal. I decided to take journalism in university. After all, journalism is a degree and my family pretty much accepted it. 

 

During my first year, I thought that all my challenges were done. I expected that, once I finally got into university, I was going to be okay. I expected to just get my degree and prove something to my family. I could move on to the next phase of my life afterward. But it didn’t work like that. I faced failures and self–doubt. Now, in my third year of university, I’ve had to throw away those expectations again, as this phase of my life didn’t work as I expected. 

 

I told myself during those times that I would be working as a journalist by the time I reached my senior year of university. I expected to be a successful writer. I expected to be very different from other writers out there. Employers would get back to me after interviews and turn me down for jobs for two reasons: they said I wasn’t qualified, and that I’m not a good writer. Several of my editors, professors and colleagues were not pleased with all the pieces I wrote. I would rewrite and rewrite, over and over again. There are a lot of better writers out there who I couldn’t compare to. I threw out my expectations again, like a useless scratch paper into the trash can. 

 

I realized that I’ve been throwing out a lot of expectations. And it all feels like a scam. Every day you set expectations for yourself. You have motivations and plans. It feels good, and it’s comforting. But if none of your expectations work, you might doubt yourself. You might criticize yourself for all the expectations you made, when you expect something but never get it. I guess that’s life and it isn’t always fair for many of us. 

 

So now I ask myself, “What do you want to achieve, Julia? What are your expectations now? Should you still expect anything? What expectations do I still have?”

 

In the end, I realized that we all have different expectations in life. The expectations I have might conflict with other people’s expectations. The expectations I set for myself changed because of the expectations of other people. I set my expectations according to others’ expectations. So what’s good about expectations? 

 

It’s hard to grasp all these ideas, but I had this vision:

 

Maybe I should dream instead. Dream without expectations. Just dream. Don’t think about people’s expectations. Just mind your own business: make your dreams into reality. 

 

I realized that I can never meet anyone’s expectations because I am me. And that’s enough, as long as I’m doing my best and I have a reason to do things. It’s all enough. 

 

I hope I and others can live with this vision soon, without regrets. 

 

—

 

Julia Magsombol is currently a journalism student from Edmonton, Canada, who desires to bring hope to people through her writing. When not writing or reading, you can catch her sewing clothes, painting nature and drinking instant coffee.

There for a Reason

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Elizabeth Atkinson, Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

There is so much pressure to succeed and make use of every hour of the day – but at what cost? 

 

Living as a young disabled person, knowing my limits has become a survival technique. With fibromyalgia, overexertion can cause flare-ups that can be detrimental and throw a wrench into future plans. It is not always easy to stay true to your limits. There can be a lot of pressure to physically keep up with your able-bodied friends and family. This can be something as simple as walking at a pace you are not comfortable with, just to keep up with your friends who don’t need to worry about conserving their energy on a short walk. Feeling safe emotionally by being able to voice these limits is key. The people around you will understand, and hopefully accommodate the limits you have set for yourself. 

 

However, it is not just disabled people who need to know their limits. It seems more and more these days people are being praised for “the grind” and while I am a fan of hard work and a strong work ethic, working to the point of exhaustion is just not healthy. People seem to be running on empty, as if their check engine light is on but they aren’t taking the time to look under the hood and find the root of the problem.

 

Limits aren’t just physical. Limits are there for a reason, whether they are physical or emotional. Knowing your emotional limits is key for setting boundaries. Personally, I have had to set limits with my family about them talking to me about my weight. I have had to set that boundary with them as it was causing my mental health to deteriorate and causing a strain on an otherwise absolutely beautiful relationship. By setting this boundary, and knowing my limits with my family, I was able to preserve something amazing. 

 

As previously mentioned, there can be a lot of pressure to forgo your limits in order to make life easier for the people around you. This, however, will not serve you in the long run as you become run-down. Emotionally setting limits and sticking to them is potentially even harder than setting and maintaining physical limits. 

 

In my opinion, pushing your limits is always overrated because limits are there for a reason, and that reason is to protect you. Staying true to your limits is a good way to ensure a happier, less stressful and more energized future for yourself.

 

—

 

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Fear Less

Posted on by andrew

Grace Cheng (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

Being afraid is quite common among all of us, including myself, and it is completely normal. Fear of the unknown is a universal problem. Fear can be an essential survival instinct: as we attempt to survive life’s different struggles, our bodies watch over us with emotions like fear. Anytime we can sense any sort of danger, our bodies send a warning sign to our brains to engage fight-or-flight responses.

 

Have you ever felt that fear has held you back from doing things that you want to do and reaching your goals and dreams? I believe that overcoming fears is a life skill that everyone needs to learn. If we do not face and overcome our fears, it can prevent us from following our dreams and paralyze us from moving forward in our lives.

 

Want to know how you can overcome your fears? I have discovered 10 practical ways for you to tackle your fears.

 

1. Acknowledge your fears

 

The first step in overcoming your fears is to acknowledge your fears. When you have acknowledged them, you are beginning the journey of addressing the potential roadblocks that prevent you from moving forward in life. After you have acknowledged your known fears, you can start to learn how you can cope with them.

 

2. Identify what kind of fears you are facing

 

To be able to conquer your fears, you need to identify what kind of fears you are facing. You will need to ask yourself the following question: What kind of things are you afraid of? It is a good idea to write down all the things that scare you and record your feelings and thoughts about them. Once you have identified your fears, you can have a better understanding of why you do things a certain way and what is holding you back.

 

3. Face your fears

 

Bear in mind that when something seems scary, it does not always mean it is going to be a massive risk to your life. You should try to face your fears by taking small steps, and gradually you will be able to decrease your anxiety level. Keep in mind that there is always more than one way to tackle your fears.

 

4. Do the things that you fear

 

Once you understand that fear is just a feeling, you can take control of your life and do the things that scare you. The feeling of fear cannot destroy or hurt you, so you have a choice to ignore it and go forward. After you analyze the pros and cons of a situation, you might realize that the possibility of a negative result is minimal. If you are not acting recklessly in your decision-making, there is nothing that can stop you from moving forward to overcome your fears.

 

5. Turn your fears into fuel for personal development

 

Overcoming your fears can be seen as a way for self-improvement and personal development. Once you have tackled your fears, it can open doors for you to better opportunities. If you want to cope with your fears, you need to allow yourself time to grow. You can use your fear as leverage to help you achieve your goals and fulfill your dreams and destiny.

 

6. Think positive

 

Thinking positively can be a powerful tool to break through your fears. It takes time to see good results, and you might have to face failures in your first few trials. But if you keep yourself positive and stay focused on your goals and dreams, you will eventually see the results that you are looking for.

 

7. Join a support group

 

It is helpful to find a support group and ask people who have experienced similar situations to see how they have managed and overcome their fears and anxiety. You can learn a lot from them, especially through hearing their stories and experiences. A support group is a great way to encourage each other and brainstorm new ways to conquer fears.

 

8. Try mediation

 

Mediation can be a great method to overcome your fears and anxiety because it allows you to find inner peace to manage mental stress. Once you can relax, it will be easier for you to reduce your fears, anxiety and everyday stress.

 

9. Exercise regularly

 

Doing exercise regularly can help us to relax our bodies and minds, thus decreasing our fears and anxiety. Yoga can be a good exercise, because it can help us lower our blood pressure, reducing our stress and fears.

 

10. Take action

 

You must take action to tackle your fears, because action is the only way to change your life. Your life is made up of the choices you make today, and changes only happen when you change. Once you conquer your fears, you will realize how much progress you made and can start to live a more fulfilling life.

 

Are you ready to take action to overcome your fears today?

 

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Grace has an accounting and finance background. She enjoys reading, writing, listening to music, watching movies and playing sports.

Managing Fear

Posted on by andrew

MacKenzie Chalmers (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

As individuals, the experience of fear may determine our next steps in our journeys. We fear objects, people, experiences or change. We fear the unknown. Fear draws on our emotions, often creating feelings of panic to rise within our bodies. It can result in avoidance of the reason for the fear. 

 

As children, we may have feared the dark, the monsters in our closets or underneath our beds, or the basement.  

 

We fear change. Change in our home, lives, school or daily activities. 

 

We fear failure. Receiving bad grades, losing a competition or game, or losing out on an opportunity can result in feeling like you have failed. 

 

We fear the unknown. The potential to lose someone close to us, whether they are a family member, friend or family pet, is a factor that can create anxiety from the unknown. 

 

These are all ways that fear becomes present within us, growing until it begins to affect our daily lives. Sometimes we can grow out of a fear, and sometimes we cannot. 

 

Some steps to overcome fear: 

 

Think about the fear. 

 

Take a moment and think about the fear that you are experiencing. Are you about to do something that could cause an injury if done wrong? Perhaps you are about to learn how to ride a bike or skate for the first time, or are learning how to drive a car. You may be scared of getting hurt or hurting someone else, causing you to fear that activity. Think about the fear and make an attempt to understand the fear. 

 

If possible, educate yourself about the fear. 

 

You may be taking part in an activity such as skydiving, bungee jumping or ziplining, or riding a new rollercoaster at an amusement park. The activity itself can appear scary due to the height or another risk factor. However, complete as much research as possible. Research the safety measures of each activity. Research written material, watch videos from others sharing their own experiences, ask people that you may know about their own experience with those activities. Research the fear in any form that is available and you can create comfort within yourself, eliminating the fear.  

 

Prepare and practice. 

 

If it is possible, practice before taking part in the activity that is creating the fear. For example, you may fear public speaking. Read aloud to yourself, practicing your speech, and then slowly ask people to listen to you speak, increasing the amount of people in order to gain comfort in others watching and listening to you. 

 

Choose the right crowd. 

 

People can motivate you. Surround yourself with people who will push you to complete the activity that is making you fearful. Choose people who will support you and try to comfort and reassure you. 

 

Visualize. 

 

Remain positive. Visualize the outcome and the happiness you will experience when completing the activity that is making you fearful. Remember the reason you wanted to do the activity in the first place. 

 

Talk to someone about the fear. 

 

Talk to someone about your fear. You may think that keeping your fear to yourself will help. Talking to someone may allow for a weight to be lifted off of your shoulders. That person could understand your fear and relate to it, and may be able to offer advice. 

 

Breathe. 

 

Keep breathing. If you get yourself into a panic, remembering to breathe could help you relax. 

 

Fear lives within ourselves. It becomes present in many ways that are different for everybody. If we do not try to overcome fear, it can take over our lives, causing us to miss out on valuable and rewarding experiences. 

 

Fear will never go away, but we can try to overcome it each time. 

 

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MacKenzie is a digital media enthusiast with interests in various aspects of media. She takes part in novel hunting, photo and video creating and creative writing.