Tag: RecoveryJourney

A Journey to Recovery

Posted on by andrew

Cristina Crescenzo (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

When you search up how to define recovery, the first thing to pop up is the following definition: it is “a return to a normal state of health, mind, or strength.” At first glance, this seems like a perfectly acceptable definition but if you sit and think about it, it offers up a vague answer to something that is actually quite complicated. In my opinion, recovery can mean a lot of different things to many different people and situations. I think it is unfair to put the word “normal” within the definition because firstly, I don’t believe there is such a thing as normal in this world and secondly, I think it puts high expectations on something that is very difficult and that pressure can cause harm. 

 

I can’t speak for others because everyone has their own way of working on and defining their recovery but in my case, if I were to say what my recovery looks like for me, I would describe it as a nonlinear journey. To me, there is no straightforward path to the top of the mountain, it’s jagged and bumpy with many routes. I also think that it’s the most realistic way of looking at life. I have learned overtime that we all want some clear idea of where we are headed: there is security and comfort in that and I have felt that urge to have all the answers many times. However, there is also something comforting in giving up control and letting the wind direct you where it wants. 

 

I am not saying that this method is meant for everyone. Some people strive in structured environments and they feel anxious without it but personally, I think you should always explore different alternatives and find the one that works best for you. I may not have had to recover from alcohol or drug abuse, but I have been in a fight within my own mind for years trying to reclaim control while also searching for happiness and meaning in my life. I have noticed that I can fixate so hard on one little slip up that it can completely erase all the progress I made the previous day. I have to allow myself room for errors so when I do fall, I am more prepared the next time so it doesn’t feel like the world crashed alongside me. I also think it would be beneficial if individuals who aren’t struggling or recovering from something took a minute and accepted the fact that even if it is hard to watch your loved one recover, they aren’t going to be fine overnight. Recovery takes time and a lot of wounded souls can feel like Humpty Dumpty who falls off the wall just waiting for someone to put them back together and I think even though that support is helpful and may seem easier. I think we need to remember that we are able to help ourselves, even if we just don’t believe it yet. 

 

In conclusion, just remember to be patient with yourself and the things life puts in your path and even though it sucks sometimes, it does make you a stronger and better person. I truly believe that. However, if my words lack gravity with the masses, take a moment to listen to “The Climb” by Miley Cyrus and keep these lyrics in your heart as a sort of mantra: 

“[t]here’s always going to be another mountain, I’m always going to want to make it move, always going to be an uphill battle, sometimes I’m going to have to lose, it isn’t about how fast I get there, it isn’t about what’s waiting on the other side, it’s the climb.” 

 

At the end of the day, when you do finally feel like you have reached a place of healing and can live a good life you will be able to look back at the person you once were and appreciate the journey. 

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My name is Cristina Crescenzo and I am a university student who has a passion for writing. I hope that through my blog posts people can connect with me and learn something. I also want to bring constant awareness to mental health and the disabled community and I believe I can do that best at Low Entropy.

Inspiring Hope in Recovery

Posted on by andrew

Elizaveta Garifullina, Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

Can we influence the recovery process? Undoubtedly, we can. Our faith and our thoughts can worsen our health or improve it.

 

Many diseases can appear because of our psychosomatics. Many people believe that diseases are a factor in us doing something wrong. It may seem complicated, but the great thing is that we can also positively impact our health. If we have strong faith in our recovery, we can accelerate the process of healing. 

 

Just imagine one person constantly saying that he will never be rich in his life, and the second person is sure that his fortune will be abundant and he will build his own profitable business. Who will be more successful? The answer comes to mind almost immediately, of course, the second person, because the first one sabotages his success. 

 

It is the same with health. Two people may have the same health condition. They are given the same medications; they follow the same routine. But the first person is sure that his health is too bad and he will not recover, and the second not only believes and hopes but also knows that he will recover. This person has decided that he will recover; he has no doubts or anxiety. Anxiety will only worsen your health; it never helps anything.

 

I want to give an example of the story “The Last Leaf” by the excellent writer William Sydney Porter, known to the world under the pseudonym O. Henry. Two girls settled in an apartment, organizing a tiny painting studio there. One of the girls is seriously ill; she was diagnosed with pneumonia. The doctor fears for the girl’s life as Jonesy prepares to die. She decided that as soon as the last leaf fell from the ivy outside the window, the final minute of her life would come.

 

A strong wind with rain and snow rages outside all night, mercilessly tearing the leaves from the old ivy, which means that the girl does not have long to live. When Jonesy asks her friend to open the curtains in the morning, she sees that a yellow-green leaf is still holding on to the ivy stalk. And on the second and the third day, it still holds on and does not want to fly away.

 

Then Jonesy finds hope, believing it is too early for her to die because such a small leaf was kept there, despite the strong wind. So she can handle it. The doctor then tells the girl that the disease has receded and Jonesy’s health was on the mend. Only later do we find out that this leaf was painted by an old artist who sacrificed his life and went out at night in such weather to save the girl by painting his masterpiece. 

 

Sometimes all the pills in the world are powerless if a person is sure that the disease is more potent than him. But if a person has hope and faith, medicines will be a thousand times more effective. 

 

Faith, confidence, and calmness are reflected in our brain activity, which leads to a healthy mind and, as a result, a healthy body. A healthy brain performs many critical mental functions simultaneously, producing a large number of waves of brain activity of different frequencies reflecting these functions.

 

With today’s stressful lifestyle, we often show increased beta activity. Many are looking for ways to produce alpha waves – peaceful existence and relaxation to overcome this negativity. When we raise our alpha and theta (including mu) activity through constructive processes – meditations, exercises, through audio-visual stimulation, we achieve changes in the state of consciousness or “alpha activity.” We must learn how to produce alpha waves on a daily basis through meditation or other tools.

 

When the frequency of brain waves slows down, we plunge into the depths of the subconscious. The higher the frequency of brain waves, the more active the consciousness and the more attention we pay to the outside world, which is not always a good thing.

 

Remember that our mind can be a cure.

 

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Leave your thoughts for Elizaveta in the comments below — better yet, start up a dialogue with the Low Entropy community in person at a Conscious Connections meeting or online at our community site. You can also follow us on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, Twitter and YouTube to stay up-to-date with Low Entropy news!

Recovery; Taking the First Step

Posted on by andrew

Eri Ikezawa (she/her/hers), Low Entropy Volunteer Writer

 

In an ideal world, an imaginary paradise, at its heart quixotic and utopian, we would lie on a bed of immaculate roses with the thorns shorn off—surrounded only by the rich floral perfume and soft petals on our skin. No misfortunes or heartaches, living in blissful and undisturbed contentment. 

 

Unfortunately, the real world is not like that.

 

Every day, people face a series of adversities, and depending on what else is going on in their lives, it can be a true test of character. When one is already burdened with their old tribulations, it’s not easy for them to react with grace and poise, especially when already being pushed to their limits.  

 

I think, first and most importantly, to recover from adversity one must start off by really contemplating the complicated emotions surrounding whatever is ailing them. Whether it is career dissatisfaction, relationship failures, or the passing of a loved one, I truly believe introspection is where we must start our healing process. 

 

Throughout my life, I have always been grateful for having an instinctual knowledge of why exactly I feel a certain way about any issue that I struggle with—or, if I began with unawareness, I would gradually begin to understand how and why I felt that way. 

 

In that same vein, the moments where I had felt clouded or discombobulated were the ones that I had felt most despondent about. 

 

Now, if I were to articulate why that is, I would say without the conscious awareness of how I am feeling, it can feel nearly impossible to form a solution to the problem. For example, after being in a car accident in 2018 where I experienced long-term physical repercussions, forcing me to work significantly less hours and preventing me from enjoying regular extracurriculars, for a long time afterwards, I felt lost, isolated and melancholic. 

 

But since those emotions were closer to a simmer than a boil, I never heard the bubbles nor did I feel the steam—it was a seemingly innocuous pot sitting on the stove, silent and stoic. 

 

So, in this specific instance of recovery (from the aforementioned car accident), I spent months feeling like there was a dark cloud hanging over my head. I began to feel old sentiments of inferiority and inadequacy resurfacing, emotions I thought I had gotten a better handle over, which led me to feeling incredibly frustrated and angry. Not only did I feel as though I had lost control over the wheel of my life, but I also just didn’t feel like myself pre-accident anymore. 

 

And worse yet, I spent these months watching my peers walking further and further away from me—catastrophizing to the point where I believed they were mere specks off in the vast distance, sneering smugly at me for being an unaccomplished loser. All I could think about was how they were furthering their career aspirations and participating in activities that made them happy and, in those moments, it was hard to be happy for them because I was so miserable. This in turn made me feel worse because I normally pride myself on being a present and good friend to people. I didn’t recognize this version of myself, with concealed jealousy and spitefulness, and I loathed it—and myself for feeling this way.

 

So, this cycle of dejection continued, much like a grotesque ferris wheel I’d involuntarily been forced onto, watching in despair each time I passed the exit stairs, destined to go for another miserable round on the nightmarish ride. 

 

It was only when I finally realized and recognized that I wasn’t feeling functional anymore that I was able to begin the healing process. 

 

I was fed up with feeling distant from my friends because I was blatantly jealous of how they were progressing in their lives and how mine had stagnated—purely due an incident that was not even of my own doing! I was sick of making unhealthy physical decisions due to what I now realize was a lapse into depression—whether it was drinking more frequently than I had in the past, or not seeking physical therapy despite my injuries, or sleeping too little or too much. 

 

And quite frankly, I was just tired of feeling depressed. 

 

It wasn’t easy to finally articulate what the lingering melancholy had been, but once I did, for the first time in a while, I saw a bashful little ray of sun sneakily edge its way past the clouds surrounding me to greet me in what felt like ages. 

 

The next step after recognizing what is troubling you, I believe, is to bring awareness to your support system so they can act like scaffolding while you work to reconstruct yourself back to a functional state again. 

 

Once I told my family and friends about how I’d been feeling, it was easier with their open acceptance and encouragement to seek treatment. I felt my spirit being rejuvenated by the overwhelming love and support I’d received, and I used that inspiration to move me into action. 

 

After all this, I also think it’s vital to remember that healing is neither linear nor instantaneous. Life would certainly be much easier and much more pleasant if we could easy bake our way to healing and recovery, but unfortunately, that isn’t how the cookie crumbles. 

 

It takes commitment and determination, actively making sound decisions that will eliminate wellsprings of unproductive distractions. It is so easy to let days lapse into weeks into months when we are feeling defeated from whatever adversity that we face, but it is infinitely more worth it to steamroll over our hardships, flattening them into slabs we use to pave our path moving forwards. 

 

At the end of the day, it is ultimately up to us as individuals to make the difficult choices to create a mental environment conducive for recovery. I truly subscribe to the belief that we must first acknowledge what the problem is ourselves before we can seek out other resources to assist us because if we don’t know what the problem is—or that there is a problem—then how will people know how to soundly advise us? Once we have a better understanding of ourselves, then the steps of healing and recovery—however difficult it may be—will slowly fall into place. 

 

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My name is Eri Ikezawa and I have an extended minor in psychology and a major in linguistics. I’m still on the path to quelling questions about myself and the direction I want to head in, but in the meantime, I have always wanted to find a way to help others and contribute to a community dedicated to personal development and self-love.